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LIJ Episode Videos

Immersed in Japan

Moving to any culture outside of your own is a huge adjustment, and the amount you have to adjust only increases as you cross oceans and go from a Western country to an Eastern one (or visa versa). If you already know the language of your new country, it’s a HUGE advantage, but very few people move oversees that way. One of the fastest ways to adjust, although perhaps the most difficult way, is complete cultural immersion.

If you’re single and able to house with a native speaking family (a homestay or exchange program), it is by far the fastest way to learn a new language and culture. Growing up in America, my family often had exchange students living with us for 6 months at a time. It wasn’t easy for those students, since everything they knew was different. Often it wasn’t just their first time outside of their country, it was also their first time outside the home they grew up in! That’s a lot of stress, even if you like that sort of thing! But if you can handle it, it is by far the fastest way to adapt to a new country.

If you’re moving with a family, then the extent to which you can immerse yourself in a culture will be more limited. We opted for enrolling in language school — 3 hours a day of Japanese language and culture taught to us by locals. I did 2 years of this and I am very glad I did. The speed of your adaptation is up to you: being brave and asking for help from strangers and making friends goes a long ways towards learning faster. We have found the Japanese people to be very helpful in this regard.

Our kids are even more immersed — they get to do authentic Japanese school, although without the help of Japanese parents. They are adapting to Japan in such a natural way that it is astounding. We believe this will be a big advantage for them later in life, building bridges between our cultures and being able to feel at home in Japan or America, fluent in Eastern and Western cultures.

For us, we’ve had tremendous support from friends and family back in the States and — I can’t overstate this — from our church family here in Japan. Our Paz Church is an awesome international community and the loving relationships that are developed there have helped us immensely. It has been an anchor for us as we navigate the stresses and ups and downs of adjusting to a new country and culture. There are days that are so exciting. Then there are days when you just feel like moving back to the familiar. You need support in order to stay healthy and flourish.

We don’t want our kids to lose touch of their roots as they grow towards their God-given destinies. Our church family gives a strong foundation and identity for our family to build upon, and it makes our lives here in Japan that much more rich and fulfilling.

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LIJ Episode Lives Videos

Food & Fellowship in Japan

What we eat is deeply tied to our customs, culture and the produce of the land we live in. Growing up in the midwest (known as the breadbasket of America) beef, pork and chicken were plentiful. The crops that filled our grocery stores were often grown locally, and those that weren’t were mostly grown in America. There was an almost endless sea of options before you at the supermarket, all at a good price.

When my wife and I moved to northern Brazil, our diet also changed. The variety of food that we enjoyed in America was replaced with Brazil’s staple food of beans and rice. Add to that the local manioc root called “farinha” and a side of meat, and you had yourself a meal. Many Brazilians wouldn’t even consider that they’ve eaten a meal unless they’ve had rice and beans! And the fish! Oh, the fresh-water fish from the Amazon River is second to none. Delicious and plentiful, I developed a deep appreciation for fresh-water fish in Brazil.

But there were times I longed for a good old-fashioned American burger with cheese, corn on the cob with butter and salt, and some apple cider to go along with it. Perhaps a side of potato salad! My mind would recall times enjoyed together with friends and loved ones in America talking and laughing together as the night slipped away. Ah! There’s more to what we like to eat than just taste. Often our favorite foods are our favorites for a reason: they remind us of a good experience — a beautiful view or a special time in life. A certain meal at a particular restaurant can remind us of when we fell in love, and other places can trigger nostalgia.

Now that we live in Japan, the rice and beans of Brazil have been replaced with the staples of Japan: sticky rice, seafood and ramen with a base of soy sauce. There’s a completely different taste to the palette of Japanese cuisine. If you didn’t grow up eating things like natto (fermented beans) or mugichya (tea), you might just gag your first time trying them. That is, until you develop the palette for it. Customs and cultures are as much like cuisine as anything else. What we grow up is normal to us — until we’re introduced to something else. If we keep braving the new experience until we are used to it, we find we have grown to appreciate a deeper aspect of life.

When we expand our experiences and appreciation for other cultures, foods and places — not putting them down or being closed off to them, but embracing the good parts of them — then we grow in our ability to experience joy and satisfying relationships with others on a deeper level. While 20 years ago I could have never imagined being homesick for anywhere but the midwest, now I miss America and Brazil! There are experiences, relationships and cuisine unique to both. And when I’m traveling away from my new home of Japan, I miss the people and food here, not to mention my family!

East meets West in this classic edition of Life in Japan, when I went to America for work while the family stayed at home in Japan.

My point is this: without forging out into the unknown, you can’t grow as a person. But growing as a person is the key to enjoying life in ways that you could never have imagined.

The Bible emphasizes the importance of family and fellowship with others by sharing meals and encouraging one another. This is key to being a healthy, well adjusted person. But what that looks like and just how it plays out in each and every culture is very different. Without a doubt, this diversity is special and unique and to be celebrated world-wide.

God’s promise is “Wherever two or more are gathered together in my name, there I am with them in their midst.” God’s Spirit is the Spirit of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness and self-control. When we meet together in Jesus’ name, the fellowship is more rich and meaningful than any other type of get-together. It is a central part of the experience that we call church, and it is bigger than any one culture. If you’ve never experienced that, it’s time to try for yourself. I’d like to extend an invitation to you to join us at Paz Church, or if you are not near us, ask around your area to find a local church that people recommend. The experience alone will expand you as a person and allow you to experience a joy you never thought possible. There are so many stories of people who, for the first time walking into church, began to cry because there was so much love and hope in the room. I want you to experience that too!

Our life is so rich now because of the three cultures we have come to love and appreciate. Each culture’s cuisine and interaction define a way of interacting with others that is rich, complex and meaningful. How much more rich will it become as the years go by? Enjoy this week’s Life in Japan: What we eat in Japan when we’re together. So many of the precious people in this episode are not only our family members in Japan, but our extended church family — the brothers and sisters that make our experience here in Japan so rich. Bon appetite!

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LIJ Episode Lives Videos

Why We Go to Japanese School

As westerners living in Japan, the decision of where to send your kids to school can be a bit overwhelming. You want them to have the best education possible, and at the same time you want them to learn Japanese and fit into Japanese and Western cultures just fine. Upon arriving in Japan, while Becca and Anna (our oldest daughters) were still 4 years old, we looked into the different options.

We could send them to international schools where they would grow up learning in English. Some are even good Christian schools, which were very attractive to us. But at the same time we wanted our kids to learn Japanese and make good connections locally. These private schools were not local.

Also, we’d heard of the intense pressure Japanese students undergo and bullying which can be problem. These things were certainly red flags to us. The more we talked with others, we found out that the real pressure to perform begins when students prepare to go into Junior High School. They want to get good grades to place in the good schools. Then of course the same thing happens for High School and finally college. Once students get to college, it is perhaps the most free time in the life of any student in the Japanese system.

We wanted the kids to learn Japanese but eventually prepare them for university in English (most likely in America). We determined we could have our kids in local Japanese schools up until Junior High, at which point we could either home school them (yikes!) or move them to an international school that teaches in English. We’d heard of some other students that did it this way and it was very positive for them.

So for now we keep a close eye on our kids, always asking them about other students (or potential bullying), friends, teachers, etc. Many times they haven’t quite understood what all was going on, and we weren’t able to help them much in terms of the Japanese, but that’s where good friends really helped out. Several friends would help us make sense of the system and we even enlisted the older girls in after-school sessions that helped them with their school work.

Since the girls are in 5th grade, soon we will need to cross the bridge of what we will do for them in Junior High School. Until then, it has been a positive experience having our kids go to local Japanese schools.

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LIJ Episode Lives Videos

Is it over yet?

There are seasons in life that we would rather rush through. Junior high school was like that for me. I couldn’t wait to get through it. School days seemed so long with so little time to do the things that I loved. I loathed going to school (loathe is the opposite of love). I had been home schooled until 7th grade when I entered private school. Home schooling was great because I worked hard and got all my homework done by noon, when I was then free to do the things I loved: music, play sports, be creative, play games and the list goes on. But in school, it didn’t matter how hard you worked, you were there most of the day. When I finally made it to college, I loved it — it felt like homeschooling! You didn’t spend nearly as much time in class, which meant that if I worked hard, you had time for the things you loved.

This season of everyone being stuck at home kind of reminds me of junior high school. It doesn’t matter how hard you work, you just have to do your part and wait it out. Waiting can be hard. But as I look back, I needed junior high school. It taught me the disciplines that were necessary to succeed in life. I wouldn’t have been ready for high school or even college without going through that phase in life. I think that what we are going through right now with the quarantines and the states of emergencies is preparing us for something greater on the other side. Something we wouldn’t have been ready for had we just rushed into it without the proper preparations.

This time has taught us how to love each other better, it has turned our attention back to the family and brought us closer to each other. It has forced us to establish habits in our lives, marriage and family that sets a better foundation for the future. We are closely involved in our children’s formation — their character is being formed each and every day. We ourselves are becoming better people as we have to force ourselves to stay healthy.

The title of this week’s Life in Japan video is “Is it over yet?” And although we often feel this way, the truth is that we don’t want to rush out of this season, because with each and every day we become more and more of who God has purposed us to be.

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LIJ Episode Lives

Conquer the Moment

History is changing before our eyes so fast that it’s hard to keep up. Every part of society is scrambling to figure out what to do next — from governments and corporations down to churches and families. Everyone in every nation has been effected to some extent or another. And moving forward no one really knows just how much things will be different. This can cause a lot of stress and fear. Or it can be seen for what it is: one of the greatest opportunities in history.

It’s not just about surviving the times — although that’s certainly important. It’s about seeing the opportunities and conquering the moment. It’s about evaluating the times and seizing the day. Things that never worked before are working now, and things that once were extremely successful are barely getting by. And possibly one of the biggest shifts in society during this time has happened with the family.

Family members, once dispersed across a large area in many different activities and schedules are now centralized at home once again. Kids at home with their parents. Parents at home working, kids at home doing schoolwork. It can be a recipe for disaster, or the greatest opportunity of a whole generation. It all depends on your perspective of the situation and approach.

There’s an opportunity to discover the joy of being together as a family. There’s an opportunity to have meals together at a dinner table and talk to each other. There’s an opportunity for parents and children to get involved in each others’ lives again and connect in a a meaningful way.

No one really knows how long life will be like this, but we shouldn’t be just counting the days until things go back to “normal,” but take advantage of each and every day God’s giving us to focus on what really matters. It’s time to conquer the moment.